When someone mentions the word ‘share’ I tend to think of communities, family but mostly of children. As kids on the playground, we are told to share – share our toys with others, share our time on the swing, share the sandpit. And more often than not these other kids are not even our friends – they are strangers which happen to be in the same space as us. Yet, as kids, we just do it. We share. As adults however, it almost feels like we have lost the ability to share with others. Or maybe it just doesn’t come as easy as it once did. Is ownership of things so important to us? That something is MINE and not yours?
Personally, clothing has always been something I would share. I would share with my friends growing up and I would get my family to share some of their clothes with me. It was always fun going into others’ closets and seeing all the different items, styling them and then pretending I’m on the catwalk. And it really did not matter who the clothing belonged to nor whether it would fit me size-wise. The important thing was that it would feel right for me.
Growing older, my sharing habits have changed. I guess I have become shy about sharing my clothes or borrowing others. Perhaps I thought there is stigma around wearing second hand stuff. Would others think I’m weird if I ask to borrow their clothes for a night out? However Coming to a UK university, to the wonderful city of Manchester, I was charmed by the paradise of pre-loved fashion. Charity shops, handpicked vintage as well as upcycled and reworked clothing. It really restored but also reinforced my belief that things do not have to be shiny and new, but rather that there is this lovely unique-ness about second-hand clothing. Above all, it made me reminisce to the days when I’d rummage through closets and drawers filled with clothing. Clothing that wasn’t mine but rather it was mine to borrow if I asked. And so I started learning to how to share. Again.
At first, I’d only share with my closest friends, but soon I was finding myself back in my mom’s wardrobe, borrowing 90s pantsuits and silk scarfs. And it really was just an ask away. It might sound completely cliché, but I really do believe that sharing is a form of caring. It has become my way of showing love to my friends and my family, simply by opening the doors of the closet and playing dress up.
I would love to encourage you, dear reader, to do the same. Share the things you own and encourage others too. Maybe your friend needs a fancy looking boudoir for a one-time occasion? Why not ask your nan, maybe she has one that she wouldn’t mind sharing? Or maybe your friend wants a dazzling dress for her birthday dinner – maybe you already own one! Of course, set boundaries and respect those of others. There are always some items which are not for sharing. Also keep in mind, borrowed items are not ours and therefore we have to treat them with respect and care at all times.
Be open, be mindful, be trusting. You never know how much good a little sharing can bring!